Why Is the World Never Right?

I'm running. I'm scared. I'm alone. You're not here. My world is shaking. I'm trembling, crying, screaming. I don't know what's going on. All I know is I want it to stop. I want to know. Because if I know, at least I can expect something, prepare myself for what's ahead. I'm running, I'm screaming, I'm scared. And all I know is I need you here. But you're so far, far away. Why is the world determined to keep you away from me? I need you; your strength, your love, your protection. I need you next to me. I want so badly for you to be here, lying next to me. I need to curl up and not be afraid. But you ignore me and I don't know if you care. I know you do but....I don't see it. I'm alone in a world determined to hurt me, kill me, no matter what I do. I'm scared. Because even though we've fixed us, all I see is how distant we've become. I want what we had. And I don't think we can ever have that again. All those lies, all that pain, the games and vindictiveness.....I don't think we can come back from that. You're not trying as usual and I'm just...alone in my efforts. You seem to think these things only apply to me. Well they don't. You never try unless you're gonna lose me. And then when you get me back you throw me away. Why is it you only want what you can't have? Why are you never happy? Because you're not. I know you're not. I want us to be happy. But you distance yourself. You stay away and don't try. You hurt me and I wonder if there's even a point in going on. You don't want the burden of taking care of me. I know it. I can see it in what you do, the tone of your voice, the way you look. You want to get rid of this burden of me but you don't want to be alone. I'm not a fucking package or a bag you can just throw around. I have a heart and you're always breaking it. You want me to go away but you're afraid you'll miss me. I can see it in your eyes. You don't love me anymore. You used to be...so different. But you've changed. Something's happened to you while I've grown to love you and need you more....you've grown away. You don't want me anymore.